What Has Been Related About The Permission For Crying Over The Deceased

Yahya bin Abdur-Rahman narrated from Ibn Umar that:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said: "The deceased is punished for the crying of his family over him." So, Aishah said: "May Allah have mercy upon him. He has not lied, but he is mistaken. It is only that the Messenger of Allah said about a Jewish man who died: 'The deceased is being punished and his family is crying over him.'"

حَدَّثَنَا قُتَيْبَةُ، حَدَّثَنَا عَبَّادُ بْنُ عَبَّادٍ الْمُهَلَّبِيُّ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو، عَنْ يَحْيَى بْنِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ، عَنِ ابْنِ عُمَرَ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏"‏ الْمَيِّتُ يُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ فَقَالَتْ عَائِشَةُ يَرْحَمُهُ اللَّهُ لَمْ يَكْذِبْ وَلَكِنَّهُ وَهِمَ إِنَّمَا قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم لِرَجُلٍ مَاتَ يَهُودِيًّا ‏"‏ إِنَّ الْمَيِّتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ وَإِنَّ أَهْلَهُ لَيَبْكُونَ عَلَيْهِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ وَفِي الْبَابِ عَنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ وَقَرَظَةَ بْنِ كَعْبٍ وَأَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ وَابْنِ مَسْعُودٍ وَأُسَامَةَ بْنِ زَيْدٍ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى حَدِيثُ عَائِشَةَ حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ صَحِيحٌ وَقَدْ رُوِيَ مِنْ غَيْرِ وَجْهٍ عَنْ عَائِشَةَ ‏.‏ وَقَدْ ذَهَبَ أَهْلُ الْعِلْمِ إِلَى هَذَا وَتَأَوَّلُوا هَذِهِ الآيَةَ (ألَّا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَى ‏)‏ وَهُوَ قَوْلُ الشَّافِعِيِّ ‏.‏

Jabir bin Abdullah narrated:

"The Prophet (ﷺ) took Abdur-Rahman bin Awf by the hand and went with him to his son Ibrahim. He found him in his last breaths, so he took him and put him on his lap and cried. Abdur-Rahman said to him: 'You cry? Didn't you prohibit (your followers) from crying?' He said: 'No. But I prohibited two foolish immoral voices: A voice during a calamity while clawing at one's face and tearing one's clothes, and Shaitan's scream.'" And there is more that is stated in the Hadith.

حَدَّثَنَا عَلِيُّ بْنُ خَشْرَمٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا عِيسَى بْنُ يُونُسَ، عَنِ ابْنِ أَبِي لَيْلَى، عَنْ عَطَاءٍ، عَنْ جَابِرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ، قَالَ أَخَذَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم بِيَدِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ عَوْفٍ فَانْطَلَقَ بِهِ إِلَى ابْنِهِ إِبْرَاهِيمَ فَوَجَدَهُ يَجُودُ بِنَفْسِهِ فَأَخَذَهُ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَوَضَعَهُ فِي حِجْرِهِ فَبَكَى فَقَالَ لَهُ عَبْدُ الرَّحْمَنِ أَتَبْكِي أَوَلَمْ تَكُنْ نَهَيْتَ عَنِ الْبُكَاءِ قَالَ ‏

‏ لاَ وَلَكِنْ نَهَيْتُ عَنْ صَوْتَيْنِ أَحْمَقَيْنِ فَاجِرَيْنِ صَوْتٍ عِنْدَ مُصِيبَةٍ خَمْشِ وُجُوهٍ وَشَقِّ جُيُوبٍ وَرَنَّةِ شَيْطَانٍ ‏

‏ ‏.‏ وَفِي الْحَدِيثِ كَلاَمٌ أَكْثَرُ مِنْ هَذَا ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ ‏.‏

Abdullah bin Abi Bakr - and he is Ibn Muhammad bin Amr bin Hazm - narrated from his father, that:

Amrah informed him that she heard Aishah, while it was being mentioned to her that Ibn Umar had said that the deceased would be punished for the crying of the living (over him). So Aishah said: 'May Allah forgive Abu Abdur-Rahman. He has not lied, but he is mistaken in the understanding. Rather, the Messenger of Allah passed by a Jewish woman who was being cried over, so he said: 'They are crying over her and she is being punished in her grave.'"

حَدَّثَنَا قُتَيْبَةُ، عَنْ مَالِكٍ، قَالَ وَحَدَّثَنَا إِسْحَاقُ بْنُ مُوسَى، حَدَّثَنَا مَعْنٌ، حَدَّثَنَا مَالِكٌ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ أَبِي بَكْرِ بْنِ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَمْرِو بْنِ حَزْمٍ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، عَنْ عَمْرَةَ، أَنَّهَا أَخْبَرَتْهُ أَنَّهَا، سَمِعَتْ عَائِشَةَ، وَذُكِرَ، لَهَا أَنَّ ابْنَ عُمَرَ، يَقُولُ إِنَّ الْمَيِّتَ لَيُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ الْحَىِّ عَلَيْهِ ‏.‏ فَقَالَتْ عَائِشَةُ غَفَرَ اللَّهُ لأَبِي عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ أَمَا إِنَّهُ لَمْ يَكْذِبْ وَلَكِنَّهُ نَسِيَ أَوْ أَخْطَأَ إِنَّمَا مَرَّ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم عَلَى يَهُودِيَّةٍ يُبْكَى عَلَيْهَا فَقَالَ ‏

‏ إِنَّهُمْ لَيَبْكُونَ عَلَيْهَا وَإِنَّهَا لَتُعَذَّبُ فِي قَبْرِهَا ‏

‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ صَحِيحٌ ‏.‏