Hadithcore
Sahih Muslim, 931
sahih

Hisham b. 'Urwa narrated on the authority of his father that the saying of Ibn 'Umar, viz." The dead would be punished because of the lamentation of his family over him" was mentioned to 'A'isha. Upon this she said:

May Allah have mercy upon Abu 'Abd al-Rahman (the kunya of Ibn 'Umar) that he heard something but could not retain it (well). (The fact is) that the bier of a Jew passed before the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and (the members of his family) were waiting over him. Upon this he said: You are wailing and he is being punished.

وَحَدَّثَنَا خَلَفُ بْنُ هِشَامٍ، وَأَبُو الرَّبِيعِ الزَّهْرَانِيُّ، جَمِيعًا عَنْ حَمَّادٍ، - قَالَ خَلَفٌ حَدَّثَنَا حَمَّادُ بْنُ زَيْدٍ، - عَنْ هِشَامِ بْنِ عُرْوَةَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، قَالَ ذُكِرَ عِنْدَ عَائِشَةَ قَوْلُ ابْنِ عُمَرَ الْمَيِّتُ يُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ ‏.‏ فَقَالَتْ رَحِمَ اللَّهُ أَبَا عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ سَمِعَ شَيْئًا فَلَمْ يَحْفَظْهُ إِنَّمَا مَرَّتْ عَلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم جَنَازَةُ يَهُودِيٍّ وَهُمْ يَبْكُونَ عَلَيْهِ فَقَالَ ‏

‏ أَنْتُمْ تَبْكُونَ وَإِنَّهُ لَيُعَذَّبُ ‏

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References2 variants
In-Book Reference
Book 11, Hadith 31
USC-MSA web (English) reference
Book 4, Hadith 2026 (deprecated numbering scheme)
Sharh · explanationclick to expand
No matter how grave it is, every calamity includes a reward for whoever patiently endures its severity, and the same applies to the catastrophe of death that entails losing people and dear ones. One of the habits of the pre-Islamic era of ignorance was to request in one's will that people should weep and wail over his death in opposition to all traditions and revealed laws. Islam has, indeed, forbidden this and has threatened to punish the one who does this deliberately and persistently. It has clarified that such an act brings pain and torment to the one who makes a will with it or approves it. In this Hadīth, the Tābi‘i ‘Urwah ibn az-Zubayr reports that it was mentioned to ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) that ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him and his father) said: "The dead person is punished because of his family's weeping over him," i.e., he is punished in his grave because those who are alive from among his family are weeping over him, besides doing other things of the pre-Islamic habits. A group of scholars interpreted this to be referring to whoever makes a will with it, or if this is their habit, and he does not forbid them by advising them before his death not to say or do something evil. This was a famous practice among the Arabs. So, if one thinks they will likely do this and does not advise them to refrain from it, then he is asking them to do it, and he becomes like one who does not forbid evil despite having the ability to do so. However, if he advises them to refrain from such an act and they disobey him, then Allah is far more Generous to punish him for that. Upon hearing this, ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said: "May Allah have mercy upon Abu ‘Abdur-Rahmān, he heard something but did not memorize it," because this Hadīth had a reason and it was not as understood by Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him and his father), or he mistakenly thought the Hadīth to have a general indication including all the dead people. Therefore, ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) reported the reason behind this Hadīth, saying: "A Jew's funeral passed before the Messenger of Allah (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him)", and his family members were weeping over him. So, the Prophet (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) said: "You are weeping" after his death, addressing the dead person's family, "and he is being punished". An agreed-upon version reads: Thereupon, she said: "He missed the point; the Messenger of Allah (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) had only said: Indeed, he is punished for his sins and misdeeds, and his family members are weeping over him right now," i.e., his family members are weeping over him while he is being punished for his sins. So, the reason for his punishment is not his family's weeping over him; rather, it is his misdeeds and sins. Allah Almighty says: {No bearer of burden will bear the burden of another.} [Surat al-An‘ām: 164] This means: no soul bears the sin of another soul. The Hadīth highlights the status of ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) in terms of understanding and knowledge. It also corrects the wrong concepts that some people have by using evidence and means of persuasion..